And /also/ Colin Farrell doing a Werner Herzog impression.

It's all a bit a white guy going Oh The Ancient Chinese Rituals Of It All mixed with pretty dry (wet?) documentation of the tea business in China circa 1997.

But I can see why Colin Farrell's character in 2021's "After Yang" was into this.

Let's watch the opposite of that, #173, or #823, 1997's "Air Bud."

Had no idea the origin story of Airagar Budagon was he fucks over his clown owner and then falls off the back of the clown's clown truck.

this bush is a natural basketball player

The kid has been made manager of the team (the "Timberwolves") mostly for showing up and forgetting to leave, which, you know, that's about the standards you expect from the team that's about to hire a labrador.

this dog is a goddamned menace

"The Simmons twins moved to Canada, god knows why."

imagine getting outdone at sports team tryouts by a DOG

this dog has exactly one (1) trick, to bump a ball off his nose (learned it from being a clown dog, see)

I feel like I would probably be a better basketball player than a dog with one (1) trick

Timberwolves v Warriors, no dog on the team yet, so naturally I'm totally uninvested in how this game goes

the dog is watching from the sidelines though, presumably learning basketball-- oop, he just ran onto the field

Air Bud causes a great amount of slapstick mischief and damage to both people and property -- but then bumps the ball off his nose and into the basket, to first silence, and then great applause

...to be fair, he's a better player than most of the Timberwolves

the coach is an abusive dickhead

reckon they could get a gerbil in for the job

Air Bud has been promoted to mascot.

I mean, he's no Gritty.

So far Airagar Budagon is mostly just inspiring the Timberwolves to play good. He still has exactly one (1) trick.

The clown has recognised Airagar Budagon on the news, just in time for some actual conflict in the last act.

Air Bud has been taken away by his original owner, which, you know. Quite a lot of rules that say he can do that.

Josh has committed a dognapping. Again, quite a lot of rules about this kind of thing, very clear legal precedence, etc.

clown, clown on thyself

Only twenty minutes left, we gotta be comin' up on somebody sayin' "ain't no rule says a dog can't play basketball."

"I'm tired, coach. We're dyin' out there."
"You gotta let the ball do the work."

or, perhaps, a

I scroll through various streaming services and simply click on the first thing that looks like it might be funny, #174, #824, 2022's "Senior Year."

Tough job playing the young pre-coma version of a pretty standard Rebel Wilson character, interesting how that kind of material doesn't really work coming out of someone else. Too imitative, I guess.

Tough job playing the young pre-coma version of a pretty standard Rebel Wilson character, interesting how that kind of material doesn't really work coming out of someone else. Too imitative, I guess.

*guy who was mad about Turning Red voice* this movie skips from 1999 to 2002 without ever mentioning what would surely be on everyone's entire minds the whole time, the deadly and historical events that occurred in New York City on the morning of Septemb

we should bring back 90s fashion

or at least the colours

for the most part, the rest of the 90s can stay in the 90s

but while we're at it, I'd like to staple several parts of the 2020s to the inside of a trash can

"I just found out there were eight more Fast and the Furious movies!"

in the latest one they gO TO SPACE

if I woke up from a coma after twenty years I would simply adjust extremely well

I barely remember the people I went to high school with, I definitely don't hold any grudges towards them

but I bet there's some folks from back then who could say the wrong thing to me and immediately ignite some Problems

enjoyed that

Rebel Wilson is a good, fun physical performer, Sam Richardson is cute as hell, I'm glad it lands on "the 90s and 20s were/are both annoying and miserable in unique and distinct ways," no movie is worse for a few dance sequences.

#175, or #825, 1963's "The Birds."

nobody watching this extremely bird-centric title sequence is confused about what this movie is called or about

"How do you know my name?"
"A little birdie told me."

what if HE'S a BIRD

I feel like buying somebody some birds is a bad prank.

this is just "Jaws" but with birds

I'd much rather fight one shark than Every Bird, though, at least with a shark you can just stay on dry land

what're you gonna do against birds, move underground?

"...Mitch?"

you can't even hide from them indoors!!

not a pig to be seen in this Angry Birds movie

I would simply not be so relentlessly horny that the Birds decide to make it their problem

I feel like these kids would-a been okay if Tippi Hedren hadn't made them go outside

birds just sittin' around, very stressful

"If there are bigger birds, Mitch, they'll get into the house."

THE BIRDS 2: THE BIGGER BIRDS

truly, The Birds

@Alexis "We saw one of these disoriented or deranged robots head towards the mountains, with 5000 km ahead of it it is heading towards certain death."

@Alexis Not against the rules, though.

@kurt Most American states do actually have laws against this exact kind of mischief.

@Alexis sorry, there is a rule that says a 30-something can't play basketball in a children's league

@The_T damn

they got me with the rule meant to keep out the retired basketball legend who's now the old man janitor who gives advice in the dark

@Alexis

Physician: clown thyself

is one of the great jokes of the past. (I can't figure out how to make it clear this is a pagliacci reference)

@The_T More like Physician: Clown myself.

(I love a good Pagliacci.)

@Alexis Ladies?

@kurt Dames, lassies, boids, all just different ways of spelling trouble. (So far, not even inaccurate.)

@Alexis It’s spelt BIRB. Don’t corrupt the language.