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did I ever post the boulder room

the idea is, it's a room where you go to appreciate the boulder

(no YOU'RE in a perpetual state of catching up on Dracula Daily)

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fuck low-effort IP-flex crossover properties

(and cinematic universes, too)

bring back basically incompatible series doing a movie together

Bond vs Jurassic World

Jumanji meets Charlie's Angels

Alien vs Avatar

Kingsman/Planet of the Apes

🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

exile to an uninhabited british island for everyone involved

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

this is a misogynist hate crime

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

🎵 "I was fine before" 🎵

girl you have spontaneous combustion diabetes and you're here at the hollywood bowl claiming you were fine without health insurance

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

fuck me, is "turns out they actually do really love each other and she realises this as he's about to go to military prison jail for Fake Marriage Crimes" actually being sold here as a happy ending

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

this is so bad I respect the troops even less now

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

hey, the hollywood bowl

columbo went there once

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

i mean what is a "fraudulent marriage"

> probably a marriage for fraud purposes, which this was

oh yeah that would be a fraudulent marriage

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

Wait, they've learned to love each other, and now they're... in trouble for Fake Marriage Crime anyway?

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

the thing that gets between them (for third act tension) isn't in any way the fact that he's a soldier (sent home injured) or an xenophobic republican but the fact that his backstory (huge debt from past addiction to medication) has caught up with him

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

everyone is either in severe lifelong debt or signed up to American murder squads

racism is a thing you just gotta ignore so you can get back to loving the troops and respecting your murderman husband

welcome to america

try the breakfast taco

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

This is an accurate depiction of the specific kind of hellscape America is and also a movie for 22-year old Republican TikTokers.

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

this is a bad movie

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

she talks a big game about being anti-military and anti-war and the second her fake marine husband leaves for war she's writing songs about how much she totally loves the troops

girl you've been a conservative all along

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

I would simply not go to war.

Which, to be fair, any war that would want me to show up is one we've already lost.

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🇺🇸 "Purple Hearts" (2022) 

fuck me why am I watching this

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